SHE SMILES FOR THE CAMERAS. She stands beside him at the rallies - or near them, technically, in the sense that they occupy the same general geographic region. She signs the statements her lawyers prepare describing her contentment. But according to sources close to the Tater household who requested anonymity because they value their continued employment and also their kneecaps, NATASHA TATER has something her husband doesn't know about.

A go bag.

"It's a very nice bag," said one source. "Designer. She's not going anywhere unprepared."

The bag, which sources describe as "always packed, always near the door that Dick uses least," allegedly contains a passport from a country that Natasha has never publicly named and that Dick, when pressed on his wife's national origin, has described only as "a beautiful place, very nice people, somewhere over there, Natasha knows."

Natasha has not confirmed or denied the bag's existence. A statement from her personal attorney - not the campaign attorneys, her own attorneys, a distinction sources say matters enormously - said Mrs. Tater is "fully committed to her life and is present in it each day."

Campaign manager Russ Stover, reached by phone, said Natasha is "incredibly supportive" and "was enthusiastic about Dick's announcement in a way that was visible to several people who were in the room." When asked if Natasha was in the room, Stover said she was "somewhere in the building" and that the building was "large."

At the campaign's kickoff rally, Natasha appeared onstage for four minutes and thirty-seven seconds, smiled in a way that security personnel later described in their incident reports as "technically a smile," and then relocated to what a campaign aide called "a private area" for the remainder of the three-hour event.

Dick, for his part, has described his marriage as "extremely warm" and "a relationship that works, people don't understand it, it works." He added, unprompted, that Natasha had told him just that morning how happy she was, "in those exact words, or words to that effect, Dick is paraphrasing, the sentiment was very positive."

Sources say Natasha's response to Dick's announcement was recorded by a household staff member as: "Mm." Her lawyer has confirmed this is not a denial.

The go bag was unavailable for comment.

The National Tater was unable to confirm the country of Natasha's passport but narrowed it to one of forty-seven candidates based on her name, her accent, and the single time she gestured vaguely eastward during a press event before catching herself.

Back to Press